avatar

DonQuixote

Regular Newbie

Posts: 16

Lead

Sep 26 13 12:37 PM

Tags : :

Hello,

I've been talking with this camgirl for a several months. I just turned 25, she's nearly 22, we're both from Europe (I live in the west, she in the east) I thought we had a lot of things in common (from music to temperament) and I really like (or liked I don't knwo anymore) her. I have, to my mind, treated her as I'd have treated a girl I liked in real life - even better (I don't pay to talk to girls in real life). I have never asked her to undress for me or touch herself or whatever. I don't see her that way and I'm not really interested in virtual sex (why I was on that website then, is another unrelated story and it has nothing to do with my being lonely, I'm not). I don't claim to be in love with her and she doesn't claim that either (I don't think one falls in love like that).

Anyway, she originally gave me what she now claims to be a false country and a semi-false name (the name's closely related to her supposed real name but it's not her real name). I understand why she'd do that since camming is illegal where she (supposedly at least) lives. In the past, she generally semi-jokingly said that she would like to move from her country but couldn't leave her parents alone there. She also, again, semi-jokingly said (more than a few times) that she'd like to travel and sometimes suggested, we could do it together (red flag, I know). But that was very casual, friendly talk. Nothing too serious. Still, whenever I suggested any kind of meeting in a sort of casual way, she'd be somewhat guarded. She was not magnificently eager to meet. I understand that since it was very early in our discussions.

Fast forward a few months, I told her I liked her and thought about her. I didn't really wanted to like her and I didn't think people could possibly feel like that about someone on the net. I thought it was retarded and I still think that but I can't help how I feel.

So a few talks after my telling her I like her - btw she said she liked me too and I told her that she doesn't have to sell me camgirl talk but she said she wasn't, etc, etc - and she suggested that we meet in a different country.  I didn't understand why she wanted that (I do now), she said I might find her city boring (I don't think so) and that people there don't speak English well (that's true, I checked, it's a problem for many tourists). She finally agreed to meeting in HER country and even gave me a date and a venue (a concert - band's very popular American one so I checked and it's legit). We were talking about a friend of hers on that camsite (he's old) who went and found a camgirl in another country and was gonna propose to her. I know who that guy is (seen his messages) and I think she's saying the truth about that. That's what sort of prompted her invitation and that's what made her tell me her (supposedly) real details. She was wondering whether the other girl was gonna come up with an excuse not to meet her friend but she was surprised when she learned that they finally met. She also wondered how her friend could possibly love her from the internet so as to want to meet her. That's when I came in and told her that I'd do the same (I'd go meet her) if she allowed me to. So she gave me a date and a venue.

Next meeting we were talking about her and I told her I really do care about her. After a while, she mentioned that her grandfather is likely to suffer from cancer (as red as a flag can get, I know) and that she has to pay the doctors since they're apparently quite corrupt (the doctors bit I could believe entirely - though not sure what to think about her grandpa). She still doesn't know the diagnosis though and she claims that is because corrupt doctors want money and won't do much if they don't get it. Her parents she says do not want to pay because they think it's a matter of principle - free healthcare, etc.

Now, I have told her I know she makes a lot of money, etc, etc so she knows I know that she ain't poor and she hasn't asked me for anything so far. But, something I didn't mention earlier, she would always say she couldn't travel 'cos she didn't have any money to (another red flag). But, that might really be so. If she's saving money to get out and if she's helping her parents (as she says she does), I don't know whether she'd have enough to travel even on her salary.

Anyways, I confronted her about her story. I told her the story sounded classically scammy and she couldn't understand why I behaved like that since she thought she did nothing wrong and she only wanted someone to share her problems with. Even though I told her that she didn't have to tell me she likes me for me to continue talking to her, she said she didn't say it because of that. She got tears in her eyes when I told her that so I decided to drop it.

I don't know if I am being cruel but it's truly a classical scam story. I couldn't believe anyone would play with the feelings of others - especially for someone who hasn't treated her badly in any way and was as respectful as you can be... I paid her entirely to talk to me. Haven't seen anything I wouldn't have seen on a first date with a girl. But I now know scams like that are quite common. I simply don't know what to think anymore.

HELP! 
Quote    Reply   

#1 [url]

Sep 27 13 12:43 AM

You paid her to chat with you which makes it profitable for her to keep you interested. The money motivates lies (or creates fantasy) making it difficult for you to know whether she is sincere. Even if you switch from paying and visiting her at the camsite to communicating by email or free instant messaging, she could be hoping to get a free holiday or gifts from you. In a real relationship, if you give her gifts, then she gives you comparable gifts in return.

Your age difference is small which makes it more likely she is being sincere.

Written by DonQuixote:
I don't claim to be in love with her and she doesn't claim that either (I don't think one falls in love like that)

Because a scammer would recognize your attitude and adapt to the level of relationship that you seek, this is not something you can use to determine her sincerity.

About the false name, all webcam models are advised to create a false "real" name to give to members to make them feel special. It has nothing to do with the legality of webcamming in her country. Nevertheless some models reveal their real names.

Because she lives in Eastern Europe, she probably works for a studio or works at home using a studio account and splits her earnings among the studio and webcam site. The studio may have rules against models meeting members. Most webcam sites (but not MFC) forbid models from revealing their real names and addresses. This is the most likely explanation for giving false identity and location. Few Eastern European webcam models are independent webcam models. If she is an independent webcam model, she likely has very high earnings, probably more than you and is probably playing with you. If she works at MFC, you can estimate her earnings from her camscore and the number of days she works. If she works at another camsite, it is more difficult to estimate her earnings. She might work at multiple camsites further complicating an estimate of her earnings. If you hear sound effects from other webcam sites when you are with her, then she is simultaneously working on at least 2 webcam sites. It is possible for a model to have multiple accounts and work at one site at a time, so listening for the sound effects is not foolproof. If she is a low earning model, then it is less likely she is scamming you because refusing to deceive members may cause her to have lower earnings.

Semi-joking statements are a way for scammers to introduce suggestions. Be careful.

Be aware there are some tricks models have played on visiting members. The model could give you a false name and address allowing you to travel all the way to her country but leaving you unable to locate her. She might not show up at your appointment. The model could plan to have her boyfriend, husband, pimp or studio boss meet you at the airport or elsewhere to steal your wallet and passport. Do not tell her when your plane arrives to avoid problems at the airport (maybe lie about the arrival time). You have to trust the model enough to believe that she will not do these things to you. Meeting her at a concert has some advantage. She keeps you a secret from her family which is probably more of a red flag than an advantage. If each of you pay for your own ticket and travel expenses, then it is not an obvious ploy to get you to send her money. Robbery would still be a possibility. If she does not meet you, then you watch the concert and learn a lesson.

If she has fake breasts, it is all business to her.

Written by DonQuixote:
We were talking about a friend of hers on that camsite (he's old) who went and found a camgirl in another country and was gonna propose to her. I know who that guy is (seen his messages) and I think she's saying the truth about that. That's what sort of prompted her invitation and that's what made her tell me her (supposedly) real details. She was wondering whether the other girl was gonna come up with an excuse not to meet her friend but she was surprised when she learned that they finally met. She also wondered how her friend could possibly love her from the internet so as to want to meet her. That's when I came in and told her that I'd do the same (I'd go meet her) if she allowed me to. So she gave me a date and a venue.

Sorry, this sounds like a fabricated story to encourage you to go meet her. Can't be sure though.

About the scam using sick relatives, the model does not usually ask for money but waits for the member to freely offer it. Even if she is being sincere, surly she would know not to say such a thing to you for fear that you would interpret it as a scam. She may also be telling you about her problems to make you feel more confident with her (instead of wanting a monetary gift). A confidence game....

Quote    Reply   
avatar

DonQuixote

Regular Newbie

Posts: 16

#3 [url]

Sep 27 13 1:13 AM

She works on LJ and is a popular model there (are LJ models prohibited from giving their real name?).

I do not intend to pay anything for her - that's why I am meeting her in her own country. Again, I know scammers will adapt but she hasn't changed her tune since the first day I talked to her (before she knew what I was). I don't think she's adapting to anything. She always seemed romantic but not cheesy and definitely not into cringe-worthy statements and feelings.

She works in a studio and she says she dislikes her boss intensely. She is not very happy with her job obviously.

I won't be taking any cash with me, I use cards (only if I can't use the card will I make a withdrawal). Why would anyone steal my passport though?

I will definitely want to see her closest friends and her family (I don't think she will refuse). And we don't have to meet at the concert. It was only a suggestion, we can meet anywhere.

I am starting to think even if she's sincere and serious, this all sounds so mafia-like and complicating. I just wanted to see a girl I like, not turn myself into a detective...

My strong reasons for not thinking she's 100% scammer are that A) I haven't asked her for sex stuff and I've treated her as a girl not a camgirl or a sex worker and B) as you said, we're slightly similar in age and we have many things in common (or at least that's what I think?) and C) believe it or not, the guy story IS legit. I know who that guy is and I have read the messages. She's not lying about that, for sure.

Lol she doesnt have anything fake. Why does that matter though?
 

Last Edited By: DonQuixote Sep 27 13 1:30 AM. Edited 1 time.

Quote    Reply   
avatar

DonQuixote

Regular Newbie

Posts: 16

#4 [url]

Sep 27 13 1:15 AM

PolarBearHas she seen you, that is, have you sent her photos or streamed your webcam video to her?

Do you look like a man she would want?
 

Yes she has seen me since day one - I use live webcam.

I really don't know what kind of men she could possibly want though... I should say I look younger than 25. She thought I was 20 (didnt know my age, just saw my face on webcam) and I don't know anyone who believes I'm 25 either online or in real life.

Last Edited By: DonQuixote Sep 27 13 1:30 AM. Edited 2 times.

Quote    Reply   

#5 [url]

Sep 27 13 9:16 AM

Models are prohibited from giving out or receiving real personal information according to LJ Basic Rules for Models.  At the very least she is risking a penalty and her job by giving or receiving real personal information from you.

13. Performers are prohibited from giving out, accepting, or encouraging anyone to exchange personal details (real name, address, etc.) or contact information (phone number, email address, Messenger, Yahoo ID, etc.). Those who violate this rule will have their accounts suspended.

The passport is stolen to prevent the member from attempting to contact the model.  Without a valid passport, the local police will not allow the victim to travel in the country.  He will be sent to his country's embassy and back home.  Without a passport in Russia, the member would probably be denied travel and exit until he gets a new passport and valid Russian visa.  Russia is a bureaucratic nightmare.

Allowing you to meet her family is a good sign.

Reason A is overridden by you paying her for chat.  She probably has other regular members who have never seen her naked.  The odds for sincerity would be improved if you had been communicating for months away from the webcam site, without paying her and during her personal time.  B and C seem reasonable positive arguments.

Fake means she acquired enough money to pay for the surgery and that she did it for her career in the sex industry.  It means she is a serious professional and is only webcamming for the money.  She would have a rule to never meet members, and thinks of them as little wallets with stick like hands and feet.  Hopefully one of the model members at this site will contribute to this thread, so you can hear this attitude from a model's perspective.

Because she is a popular model, you might be able to find more information about her, her earnings, her other accounts (if any), how long she has been a model and complaints at My Camgirl.

Webcam models typically get bombarded by men proclaiming they are beautiful and desiring them.  It provides a major boost to their egos especially successful webcam models.  Her expectations for the type of men she could get as friends and an husband would be elevated.  If she has been a webcam model for years, her webcam persona is likely different than her real character otherwise she would not be a popular model.  My point is that if you look like an average guy, she is probably more interested in your money than you.

No rule here is carved in stone.  Ultimately your decision is rooted in whether you trust her or not.  It is difficult to be certain with webcam models because you are communicating with them at their place of work.  If you do not trust her, you should not go to meet her.

Quote    Reply   
avatar

DonQuixote

Regular Newbie

Posts: 16

#6 [url]

Sep 27 13 11:26 AM

Her name is legit - she showed me her passport (if the passport is fake too, I am gonna go kill myself). I don't know how she can do that given that she's not allowed to show real IDs on cam. But she did. She was very disappointed and was crying again when I told her I didn't trust her.

Well yeah no she has nothing fake on her.

I know she's popular. I told her that she knows so many guys and is probably constantly bugged by them both in real life and on the site so why does she say she's interested in me and likes me? (she said she had never met anyone who was as pessimistic as me - I think she's just referring to self-esteem).

But you know, I can't tell her much on that.. As I said, it's not like she said she was in love with me or wanted to marry me. She's not and I don't think I am in love her (though I do care about her a lot). I don't doubt she's bombarded with proposals - she says she's mostly asked for sex stuff (e.g. to meet in real life for sex).

I am waiting for more replies but thank you very much PolarBear for taking the time to read my posts and reply.

Last Edited By: DonQuixote Sep 27 13 11:32 AM. Edited 3 times.

Quote    Reply   

#7 [url]

Sep 27 13 5:11 PM

What is she like with other members ? what are they like with her ? I think some Camgirls like the attention and sexual side of things. Just because we the user sees a Camgirl as a person and not a peice of meat
doesn't mean to say we are any better than others who go into her room in her eyes. Some Camgirls just see us all as perverts because we are on an adult webcam site. Best way to know if a CamGirl likes you is to not tip or take them pvt at all.

Quote    Reply   
avatar

DonQuixote

Regular Newbie

Posts: 16

#8 [url]

Sep 27 13 5:39 PM

PlaythingWhat is she like with other members ? what are they like with her ? I think some Camgirls like the attention and sexual side of things. Just because we the user sees a Camgirl as a person and not a peice of meat
doesn't mean to say we are any better than others who go into her room in her eyes. Some Camgirls just see us all as perverts because we are on an adult webcam site. Best way to know if a CamGirl likes you is to not tip or take them pvt at all.

I don't know what she's like with others, she's very friendly with that older guy I brought up b4. I think she's liked very much by members but I don't know what she thinks of them or how she talks to them. I don't stalk her (I only saw the messages with the older guy by accident)

I am very worried that she thinks of me like a pervert (she said LJ is bad business and I know she doesn't hold the site and its members in high regard) but she knows why I joined the site and it didn't have to do with wanting virtual sex Absolutely though, I think that is true that she might think of me like that.. which to me sounds like the worst thing she could possibly think about me.

And I don't tip - ever.

Quote    Reply   

#9 [url]

Sep 27 13 5:45 PM

DonQuixote.. From all you have said she sounds Ukrainian.. Odds are she's scamming you, but then again, she might be making "passport eyes" at you in order to find a "travel agent" who can get her out of her studio and country. If she does meet you and you do bring her home to Western Europe that's when your real nightmare could begin. These arrangements tend not to work out very well, though the fact that your ages are not that far apart is a point in your favor. Is she a student? A University graduate? Does she bring the same "cultural capital" to the table as you do? If so, that's another point in your favor..
But again, the odds are very much against you..
UL
CGN

"I would no more be a Master than a slave. It does not conform to my idea of Democracy." Abraham Lincoln 1856.

Quote    Reply   
avatar

DonQuixote

Regular Newbie

Posts: 16

#10 [url]

Sep 27 13 5:50 PM

UncleLewisDonQuixote.. From all you have said she sounds Ukrainian.. Odds are she's scamming you, but then again, she might be making "passport eyes" at you in order to find a "travel agent" who can get her out of her studio and country. If she does meet you and you do bring her home to Western Europe that's when your real nightmare could begin. These arrangements tend not to work out very well, though the fact that your ages are not that far apart is a point in your favor. Is she a student? A University graduate? Does she bring the same "cultural capital" to the table as you do? If so, that's another point in your favor..
But again, the odds are very much against you..
UL
CGN

What did I say that made you think she's Ukrainian? I do not understand what you mean by the real nightmare. Can you explain?

Yes we're both university graduates and as I said I think we have a lot in common.

Your post for some reason made me  very pessimistic :S

Quote    Reply   
avatar

DonQuixote

Regular Newbie

Posts: 16

#11 [url]

Sep 27 13 6:11 PM

Oh I should say that she told me her grandpa is beyond help. I thought chemo was done throughout the cancer cycle no matter how hopeless but she says he's a lost cause.

Now her attitude is definitely very difficult to understand. When I confronted her about the story in a message, she responded by saying I was very egocentric and only thought about myself. That I am not a victim and shouldn't act like one (that's because I told her that she shouldn't tell me stories that aren't true t make me stay), that she thought I understood her but I don't. That I never had any family problems (which is true, my family has been very supportive throughout my life and now) and that I don't want to believe her and that I put my head in the sand and didn't want to listen to her. She said we should talk and if I still can't trust her, we will say goodbye. And then she ended it by saying not to leave her and that she's afraid alone... (which sounds overly dramatic and somewhat not in sync with the rest of the message)

If she really thought all that about me then why does she bother with me? in pvt, she was far less aggressive but still quoted pieces of my message and wanted to know what I meant. As I said, she started crying when I suggested that the story was fake. When I said something about her name (which he misinterpreted and thought I didnt believe her name was what she told me), she showed me her passport.

When I asked her why she thought I was selfish, what did I do to make her think that she said that everyone is selfish... she clearly didn't mean that in the message...I told her I haven't done anything bad to her and if she wasn't interested in me, she could have told me that she wants us to remain on a customer-model relationship and I'd be FINE with it and continue to talk to her on that basis (I really would). She gets annoyed and tells me if she wanted that, she would have said it...

I am getting more pessimistic everyday.

OH what I thought was most important reading our messages again. She thought that by telling her that she tells me "stories", I meant the things she said about me. And then she was just pissed and annoyed. But when I suggested that I was referring to her family stories, she started crying and said she wouldn't use her family like that and that she's not a monster, etc.

BTW I'm trying to give a condensed version of what happens. It was a somewhat big...fight and we had a few back'n'forth messages...She said that in the future when I realise I was wrong about her, I should apologise.

Last Edited By: DonQuixote Sep 27 13 6:30 PM. Edited 4 times.

Quote    Reply   

#12 [url]

Sep 27 13 11:19 PM

I said Ukrainian because she told you that camming was illegal in her country, and the Ukraine is the only one that fits that description. It's illegal so the Militia can better collect "protection rents."
The expression "passport eyes" is a Russian one, and that's for a reason. Russian and Ukrainian women are regularly featured on all the International Marriage Broker sites like Anatascia.com and in "romance tourism" tours - which are often scams. Please read the reports in "The Situation In the Ukraine" dealing with casual prostitution.
You're not feeling pessimistic..just understanding your long odds better.
UL
CGN Mod

"I would no more be a Master than a slave. It does not conform to my idea of Democracy." Abraham Lincoln 1856.

Quote    Reply   

#13 [url]

Sep 28 13 12:18 AM

I sat here reading your story and I wonder, what do you want?


It is as clear as mud, isn't it?

There are women who scam and women who don't.

There are honest and dishonest women.

There is truth, half truths, and no truths.

How does anyone be 100% sure of anything, anywhere? 

Well, I can  be empathetic to your worries and cynicism. I can understand you lack of trust and fear of the unknown. 

What I can advise you is, if you like her as much as she appears to be interested in you, then stop paying for privates, and stop tipping, if that is possible as well on the site she works on. If she is genuinely interested in you, take it away from her work environment, as far as discussing things. If you can't accomplish that, or she says she can't do that, then a red flag appears. If she asks you to compensate for her time just to chat away from her job, that is another red flag. Although as you stated she earns alot so she had better not play that hand. But then again some people will do anything to earn money. Eliminate the money from the equation.

If you want to meet her, and you are afraid of being scammed, bring a friend with you as your eyes and ears. Be open and honest with someone you can trust.

It also appears you two are not speaking the same language. You say one thing and she interprets it in a different manner than you meant it to be, and vise versa. Some women in poorer countries do have family problems and financial problems. If she makes good money in camming, and is popular with her customers, she probably has learned the hustle quite well. 

You say she doesn't hold this work or LJ in high regards, then does that mean she just goes through the motions because of the money? After a while a woman who cams becomes desensitized to the work and the human interaction and can harden their skin to a point that is similar to a tiger stalking its prey.

I would tread very carefully and watch your back, front, ass, heart, soul, and wallet. But if this is something you need to do, then do it. You have a 50-50 chance of failure or success. Such is life. There are good and bad people everywhere. You just have to learn through experience and what logic and knowledge you find, good or bad.

One last thing, everything she said to you, could also be true about herself and her family. There is only one way to find out.

The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil...is for good men to do nothing
Edmund Burke(1729-1797)
Irish Philosopher,statesman


�With integrity, nothing else counts. Without integrity, nothing else counts.�

We can't solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them. � Albert Einstein.

"To see what is right, and not to do it, is want of courage or of principle."
Confucius

STAY THE F..K OUT OF CAMLAND...YOU ARE ALL FODDER

Last Edited By: Sep 28 13 12:21 AM. Edited 1 time.

Quote    Reply   
avatar

DonQuixote

Regular Newbie

Posts: 16

#14 [url]

Sep 28 13 2:38 AM

TRAINERI sat here reading your story and I wonder, what do you want?

It is as clear as mud, isn't it?


There are women who scam and women who don't.


There are honest and dishonest women.


There is truth, half truths, and no truths.


How does anyone be 100% sure of anything, anywhere? 


Well, I can  be empathetic to your worries and cynicism. I can understand you lack of trust and fear of the unknown. 


What I can advise you is, if you like her as much as she appears to be interested in you, then stop paying for privates, and stop tipping, if that is possible as well on the site she works on. If she is genuinely interested in you, take it away from her work environment, as far as discussing things. If you can't accomplish that, or she says she can't do that, then a red flag appears. If she asks you to compensate for her time just to chat away from her job, that is another red flag. Although as you stated she earns alot so she had better not play that hand. But then again some people will do anything to earn money. Eliminate the money from the equation.


If you want to meet her, and you are afraid of being scammed, bring a friend with you as your eyes and ears. Be open and honest with someone you can trust.


It also appears you two are not speaking the same language. You say one thing and she interprets it in a different manner than you meant it to be, and vise versa. Some women in poorer countries do have family problems and financial problems. If she makes good money in camming, and is popular with her customers, she probably has learned the hustle quite well. 


You say she doesn't hold this work or LJ in high regards, then does that mean she just goes through the motions because of the money? After a while a woman who cams becomes desensitized to the work and the human interaction and can harden their skin to a point that is similar to a tiger stalking its prey.


I would tread very carefully and watch your back, front, ass, heart, soul, and wallet. But if this is something you need to do, then do it. You have a 50-50 chance of failure or success. Such is life. There are good and bad people everywhere. You just have to learn through experience and what logic and knowledge you find, good or bad.


One last thing, everything she said to you, could also be true about herself and her family. There is only one way to find out.

I am only asking what do people think - is it possible she's telling the truth? I don't know what is clear to you, what do you mean? ofc I can never know whether she's telling the truth, I am not asking for someone to predict the future.

I know she wants out of teh country but it's not gonna be anytime soon. She says she can't quit her job, at least not now (as I said, she said she can't leave her parents anyway). If she wanted me to help her get out, she would at least prepare me (she knows now that I am very very suspicious of last minute surprises).

As regards to my bringing a friend. I'm lucky because I have a close friend from a country near to hers and he speaks her language well. He even goes there (though not to her city) for swimming. So that is almost entirely possible to do in the future (N.B. she knows I am friends with such people and she knows they could help me me out if I wanted to).

Neither she nor I speak English as our first language. OFC, we re going to misunderstand each other. That's okay with me, as long as she's willing to listen and understand. As I said, she was more than willing to talk to me about it and find a solution.

You're right that she could be telling the truth about herself. How many girls have normal families and backgrounds and still work as cam girls in Eastern Europe? (from what I understand, working as a cam model carries a big social stigma - far bigger than in the West).

As for my pessimism, it's almost entirely a product of  my reading scam stories online. I wasn't suspicious about her before because as I said, she never was enthusiastic about meeting me and she was quite guarded even whilst semi-jokingly suggesting that I take her with me (basically she was exactly like how I'd expect someone who claims to like me but is also working in a place which attracts all kinds of creeps to behave).

I MIGHT not have been suspicious of illness stories like hers because as I said above, I'd expect that cam models will have some family problems. And her story sounds so simplistic, I am wondering why couldn't she make up a more elaborate and believable story especially now that she knows I know all about such scamming stories...

Anyway, you're right trainer. I am asking questions to which no definite answer can be given.

Last Edited By: DonQuixote Sep 28 13 2:43 AM. Edited 3 times.

Quote    Reply   

#16 [url]

Sep 28 13 6:13 AM

DonQuixote wrote:
Her name is legit - she showed me her passport (if the passport is fake too, I am gonna go kill myself). I don't know how she can do that given that she's not allowed to show real IDs on cam. But she did. She was very disappointed and was crying again when I told her I didn't trust her.

We are missing a basic fact that could explain some of what is going on: How long has she been a webcam model?

Look at the dates on the oldest comments on her site to get an idea and/or check the My Camgirl site I referenced earlier.

If she has been a model for only a few months, then all of your experiences with her are new to her and she may not have the experience to scam well.  It would explain her statement about not having enough money to travel because she would not have had enough time to save the money.  It would explain her not knowing the rule forbidding revealing real identity information.  It would explain why she did not realize the story about her grandfather's cancer would likely be misconstrued.  If she showed you her internal or external passport live on webcam, then she either trusts you or is connected with people who can forge identity documents (you are in real trouble if this is the case).  If she showed you a scanned digital photo of her passport, then the name could have been modified in Photoshop.  The odds are in your favor that she trusts you and gave you her real name.

She could give out real identity information without being caught because webcam sites generally do not monitor communication.  Some studio bosses are strict and others are lax, not bothering to monitor the models.  Another possibility is that the studio boss is participating in the scam although I doubt LJ would participate in such a thing.

As for her location eastern European webcam models are principally located in 3 countries: Romania, Russia and Ukraine.  Webcamming is not illegal in any of those countries, but in Ukraine the model doing anything more than topless appears to be illegal.  Thus the industry is permitted to operate after the corrupt SBU, Ukrainian National Police, is paid tribute.  You also mentioned there is a derogatory stigma attached to women who work in the sex industry which is another characteristic of Ukraine more than of the other two.

Quote    Reply   
avatar

DonQuixote

Regular Newbie

Posts: 16

#17 [url]

Sep 28 13 7:23 AM

PolarBear
DonQuixote wrote:Her name is legit - she showed me her passport (if the passport is fake too, I am gonna go kill myself). I don't know how she can do that given that she's not allowed to show real IDs on cam. But she did. She was very disappointed and was crying again when I told her I didn't trust her.

 

We are missing a basic fact that could explain some of what is going on: How long has she been a webcam model?Look at the dates on the oldest comments on her site to get an idea and/or check the My Camgirl site I referenced earlier.If she has been a model for only a few months, then all of your experiences with her are new to her and she may not have the experience to scam well.  It would explain her statement about not having enough money to travel because she would not have had enough time to save the money.  It would explain her not knowing the rule forbidding revealing real identity information.  It would explain why she did not realize the story about her grandfather's cancer would likely be misconstrued.  If she showed you her internal or external passport live on webcam, then she either trusts you or is connected with people who can forge identity documents (you are in real trouble if this is the case).  If she showed you a scanned digital photo of her passport, then the name could have been modified in Photoshop.  The odds are in your favor that she trusts you and gave you her real name.
She could give out real identity information without being caught because webcam sites generally do not monitor communication.  Some studio bosses are strict and others are lax, not bothering to monitor the models.  Another possibility is that the studio boss is participating in the scam although I doubt LJ would participate in such a thing.As for her location eastern European webcam models are principally located in 3 countries: Romania, Russia and Ukraine.  Webcamming is not illegal in any of those countries, but in Ukraine the model doing anything more than topless appears to be illegal.  Thus the industry is permitted to operate after the corrupt SBU, Ukrainian National Police, is paid tribute.  You also mentioned there is a derogatory stigma attached to women who work in the sex industry which is another characteristic of Ukraine more than of the other two.

She's not new and she knows the rules (when guys bug her in free chat, she says can't undress there 'cos it's against the rules). She is 2 years and several months in the business and she told me she has changed her nickname before but I don't know if she got a new account. LJ does monitor her video feed but I'm not sure how strict they are with it.

She showed me a normal passport not a photocopy (I know which country she is from, I read it). When she first told me her name, she thought it was a big deal because, she says, she has never revealed it before to anyone on there. She took it for granted that I believed her about her real name and location (she seemed genuniely shocked when I later doubted she was telling me the truth - either that or she is a top Hollywood actress that is wasting her talent on there). I should also say that, when she was lying to me about her country and city, it sort of showed - she didn't answer my questions directly and the answers she gave about her country/city were very vague and repetitive. Now those are things you can easily lie about so if she can't do that well, I am not sure she's that magnificent a liar...

I clearly don't know if the document is forged ofc.

I think her boss is rarely on (she works early in the morning). When she brought me a mini cake for my birthday, she said if her boss knew that, she'd kill her. So either she was lying and this is a normal thing she does with the blessings of her boss OR her boss really isn't very lax. Then again, she says she doesnt think her boss have access to her messages (how true can that even be?). Since she says she hates him, I doubt he's lax though he might be awful in other ways (paying? hours?) whilst not giving a shit about what his models do.

She knows about scams alright (when we were discussing the story I mentioned b4, i.e. her friend meeting a camgirl, she told me that if the other camgirl made up an excuse in order to avoid meeting her friend - illness or whatever - she was playing with him for sure). So definitely knows about scammers but she seems to think scammers are those people who ask for money or say they love someone and want to marry, etc, etc. That stuff however won't fly with me and truly if she ever told me such things, I'd drop her instantly whether or not she was even meaning them. If she realised that about me (though I haven't told her explicitly about love, marriage, etc I have told her that internet compliments and crap like that count for nothing to me especially on LJ so she best avoid them with me). So I dunno maybe she's incredibly smart and evil (and I have no doubt about the former, she's very intelligent) and have figured out exactly how to make me believe things (though as I said, the way she presented her background story was not very convcing at all).

Another fact that undoubtably supports what she said about her friend meeting that camgirl. She was in pvt yesterday for an hour or so (I waited to talk to her). And today, I read another message of that friend of hers. No doubt on my mind it was him yesterday and their messages very much support that he really did meet someone (not sure if she's a camgirl ofc) and that he's happy about it, etc, etc. The messages she exchanges with non-friends are very distinctive from the messages with that guy.
 

Last Edited By: DonQuixote Sep 28 13 7:38 AM. Edited 2 times.

Quote    Reply   

#18 [url]

Sep 28 13 12:38 PM

DonQuixote, you're not the first or last guy to fall hard for a cam model. Read this member's story, 

and then the wise and brutally honest reply by one of the smartest women writing on another forum.

"This camgirl hasn't scammed you as such, or not in the way I would consider naming a scam, but if you mean all she wants from you is money? 
Then yes, technically all camgirls are scammers, because money is exactly what we want from you.

Remember, camgirls aren't real. I know that sounds silly because obviously we are real people, but the people we portray and give you on cam don't really exist."

http://camgirlnotes.fr.yuku.com/topic/3233?page=19#.UkbNGxaxYn0

UL
CGN Mod

"I would no more be a Master than a slave. It does not conform to my idea of Democracy." Abraham Lincoln 1856.

Last Edited By: UncleLewis Sep 28 13 12:41 PM. Edited 1 time.

Quote    Reply   
avatar

DonQuixote

Regular Newbie

Posts: 16

#19 [url]

Sep 28 13 1:08 PM

Ok, I'm deeply disturbed already Lewis, I din't need to read that, I know this is almost alwayas the case. However, I don't see what we have in common with that guy. I am not in love with her. She is not in the non-nude category and she hasn't asked me for money -and it turns out, it's unlikely that she will given that she considers girls who do that "scammers". I'm also not married and I'm not 40. I haven't AT ALL seen only her good side either. Crying and fighting is not my idea of her good side.

In any case, I am getting the message. I think I'm gonna let her go.

Quote    Reply   
Add Reply

Quick Reply

bbcode help